Well, hi, Jake. Come on in.
Hi, Suzanne.
- How are you? - Oh, I'm fine, thanks.
I was just wondering if I might have a quick word with Roger?
Well, sure. He's in the solarium. I'll get some coffee.
Oh, thank you.
United Airlines down three-quarters at 141.
International Business Machines down one-half to 96 and three-eighths.
American Telephone & Telegraph...
- Hey, Jake. - Hey, Roger.
Nice place.
Yeah, we're still working on it,
trying to figure if we wanna take this room Oriental or Santa Fe.
Listen, Rog, I had to talk to you about something,
and I didn't want to do it in front of the rest of the team.
Yeah, sure. What is it? Here, have a seat. You want a beer?
Oh, no, thank you.
You have financial problems?
I could put you on to a great investment guy.
No, I don't have much of a portfolio right now,
but, you know, what I was concerned about
was why you didn't come up with that grounder
that Reichart hit in the ninth.
It was out of my reach. What do you want me to do, dive for it?
Rog, it could have meant the game.
Oh, come on. Cut the rah-rah shit, Taylor.
Year after this, I go free agent.
Plus, my agent and I got a couple of plans for life after baseball.
So, I am not about to risk major injury,
or deface this property, for a collection of stiffs.
You know, Dorn,
I liked you so much better when you were just a ballplayer.
You were really great once.
If you want to be an interior decorator now,
that's none of my business,
but some of us still need this team.
Now, you listen to me. This is my last shot at a winner.
And for the younger guys, it could be their only shot.
I don't know what happened to you,
but if you ever, ever tank another play like you did today,
I'm gonna cut your nuts off and stuff 'em down your fucking throat.
Coffee, anybody?
Hello again, all you Wahoo maniacs. This is Harry Doyle welcoming you
to another edition of Teepee Talk.
Hey, in case you haven't noticed,
and judging by the attendance, you haven't,
the Indians have managed to win a few here and there,
and are threatening to climb out of the cellar.
Wild thing, you make my heart sing.
You know, they could be a lot worse.
You know, these guys ain't so fucking bad.
Oh, boy, this old body could use a soak.
Yeah? Well, forget it, 'cause it ain't working again.
Damn it! I thought they were gonna replace this thing.
Hey! No hot water in here.
I've had it with this nickel-and-dime stuff.
I'm gonna get that bitch on the phone.
- You wanted to talk to the bitch? - Yeah.
Don't you think you ought to cover yourself with a towel first, Mr. Brown?
We're out of towels,
and I'm too old to go diving into lockers.
I can take it if you can.
What happened to the new whirlpool we were supposed to get?
Revenue problems have forced us to cut back on equipment.
Cups still work, though.
We'll simply have to fix the old whirlpool.
You fixed it six times already.
Now there's no hot water in the shower.
The pipes in this building are old and rusted.
We're replacing them, but it's a long, expensive process.
Sorry.
How am I supposed to keep my players healthy
with cold water and no therapy equipment?
Your players will just have to get a little tougher.
What are they, a bunch of pansies?
Over 162 games, even tough guys get sprains,
sore arms, muscle pulls.
It's only temporary.
Besides, these guys weren't playing that good
when the equipment was working.
If I could get anybody to come out and watch this team,
none of this would be necessary.
You ought to be grateful I can still afford to pay your salary.
Harris winds and delivers.
Vaseline ball, swung on and grounded to short.
Hey, easy play for Malina. Up with it, throws to first.
And this ball game is over,
as the Indians beat the Tigers five to four.
Harris struggled, but picked up his ninth win of the season.
Frank, I need a car, quick,
and mine's on the other side of the stadium.
- Take the bullpen car. - Yeah.
Whose place are we at this time?
Mine.
Did you follow me again?
I spotted you in the stands.
Figured you wanted to see me about something.
I just wanted to see you play.
How was I?
You ought to open your stance a little. They're pitching you inside.
I'll try that.
What's all this?
I'm moving in with Tom.
- Going uptown, huh? - No.
Not going uptown.
Just want to lead a regular life, you know. Like an adult, maybe?
You think I can't lead a regular life?
Oh, God, Jake.
Do you like the life you've had?
You like hanging out with the boys, living in hotels,
having girls send you their underwear in the mail.
Remember the surprise party I threw for you on your birthday?
You never showed up,
but the doorbell rang once, and we all got real quiet
and hid behind the furniture.
It was a guy to serve you with a paternity suit.
That was a hoax. The girl was looking for some publicity.
Yeah, but you'd obviously been with her.
And it happened in front of all of our friends.
Those days are gone, Lynn.
I'm just a guy trying to put his life back together.
I've come back to you so many times, Jake.
I can't afford to believe you anymore.
Well,
I guess this is our last hurrah, then.
Yeah. I guess so.
Hey,
did you ever read Moby Dick?
Cover to cover, babe.
When's the wedding?
October 3rd.
Your folks like this guy?
You're still their favorite.
- Gonna be a big wedding? - No, Tom doesn't like big weddings.
You know, you could have read Plot Outlines of 101 Great Novels.
- Where? - At any library.
- No, no, no. Where's the wedding? - Oh, All Saints, on Euclid.
- Nice church. - Yeah.
- Who saved Ishmael at the end? - What?
Nobody. It was Queequoc's... Queequeg's coffin.
Yeah.
- Am I invited? - Where?
- To the wedding. - Yeah.
- Lynn? - What?
The zipper on your skirt's stuck.
Use your imagination.
You know, this doesn't change anything.
We were always good at this.
We're 60 and 60. Nine games out of first.
Who do these guys think they are?
Maybe you just have to accept the fact they're not as bad as you hoped.
I don't have to accept anything.
Attendance is only just beginning to rise.
If we can force a losing streak, we can still turn this thing around.
What's left to do? You've taken away everything you can.
Not everything.
Hey, Ricky, I'll trade you Song of Hiawatha for The Deerslayer.
Nah, I'm not into Song of Hiawatha.
Veg-head, I think I got one here that's right up your alley.
Crime and Punishment.
Hey, is that a detective story? Yeah?
"Wild Thing" Vaughn
roughed up in his only other appearance against the Yankees,
in a little jam here.
He fanned Burton to open the inning,
walked Saslow, gave up a double to Billy Leff,
which will bring up Haywood,
who leads the league in most offensive categories,
including nose hair.
When this guy sneezes, he looks like a party favor.
Taylor, they ain't released you yet?
Haywood's a convicted felon, isn't he, Monte?
- Doesn't really say it here. - Well, he should be.
Vaughn among the league leaders in strikeouts now,
up on the rubber and ready to work.
And from the wind-up, here he comes.
Haywood swings and crushes one towards South America.
Tomlinson's gonna need a visa to catch this one.
It is out of here, and there's nothing left but a vapor trail.
Vaughn continues to have problems with Haywood and the Yankees.
Oh, boy.
Hi, Lou.
Donovan, what are you doing here?
Well, I just wanted to get back out on the road again.
You know, you had a hell of a road trip. You nearly pulled that one out today.
Someday we'll figure out how to beat those guys.
You know, you've done a great job this year.
60 and 61 is hardly a great job.
With this club, it is.
You know, there's a lot of talent on this club, Charlie.
The veterans are starting to play back to form,
and the rookies are developing faster than I thought.
There's two or three potential all-stars in there.
I think we're a contender, right now.
You really believe that, don't you?
I know it.
All we need is something to bring it all together.
Rachel Phelps will never allow that to happen.
Can I have your attention, please?
I have something I think you all ought to know about.
It seems that Mrs. Phelps doesn't think too highly of our worth.
She put this team together
because she thought we'd be bad enough to finish dead last,
knocking attendance down to the point
where she could move the team to Miami
and get rid of all of us for better personnel.
Even me?
Even you, Dorn.
What if we don't finish last?
She'll replace you with somebody who will.
After this season, you'll be sent back to the minors
or given your outright release.
Well, then I guess there's only one thing left to do.
What's that?
Win the whole fucking thing.
- Yeah. - Yes!
Yes!
Yeah.
I figure it's gonna take 32 more victories to win this thing.
Every time we win, we peel a section.
Yeah.
Come on.
Oh, shit.
Strike!
He's out!
Safe!
- Yeah, man. - Yes!
Strike!
Shit!
He's out!
Hello. Do you know us? We're a major league baseball team.
But since we haven't won a pennant in over 30 years,
nobody recognizes us,
not even in our own hometown.
That's why we carry the American Express card.
No matter how far out of first we are, it's cool.
You know, it keeps us from getting shut out
at our favorite hotels and restaurant-type places.
So, if you're looking for some big-league clout,
apply for that little green home-run hitter.
Look what it's done for us.
People still don't recognize us, but...
We're contenders now.
The American Express card. Don't steal home without it.
Yeah!
Safe!
Cowabunga!
Good afternoon, ladies and gentlemen.
The incredible has happened.
Even though it comes as no surprise to this commentator,
the Indians have finished the regular season in a first-place tie
with the New York Yankees
on the strength of a 4-2 win over the White Sox
in Chicago today.
All right!
Not bad for a has-been and a couple of never-will-be's, huh?
Yeah. Yeah.
We haven't won anything yet. Still got one game to go.
The Indians are still savoring their victory today in Chicago
but are due to leave in a few hours.
We're going to go back now to Ross Farmer,
who's standing by with the team at their hotel.
Thank you, Hal. Well, as you can see,
the Indians are in high spirits tonight,
looking forward to their final showdown
with the Yankees.
Who will start that game is still a matter of some conjecture,
but the smart money is on the crafty veteran, Eddie Harris,
or the young fireballer, "Wild Thing" Ricky Vaughn.
Meanwhile, the Yanks have announced
that they will start 20-game winner Steve Jackson,
a curve-ball specialist who has shut...
You wanted to see me, skip?
Yeah, Rick. Have a seat.
I just wanted to tell you that I'm starting Harris
against the Yankees tomorrow,
even though I know it's your turn in the rotation.
He's got a little more experience,
with a bit better record against the Yankees.
Yeah, I guess what's best for the team.
Don't read anything into it, Rick.
You're one of the guys that got us here.
Hello again, everybody.
Harry Doyle coming to you live from the stadium,
where the Indians have just returned home
in preparation for their one-game play-off
with the New York Yankees for the Eastern Division Championship.
We'll have interviews on Indians Powwow at 8:00,
but in the meantime, get your tomahawks ready, Cleveland.
You're the best!
You mind if I join you?
I don't think I'd be very good company right now.
- Why not? - Nothing.
Job problem.
- I'm a ballplayer. - I know.
But that's not why I came over here.
I don't chase ballplayers.
Why'd you come over here then?
Because you are the sexiest man I have ever laid eyes on,
and you look like you could use a friend.
Check.
Where are you going?
I've got to get home.
I don't think I ever got your name.
Suzanne. Suzanne Dorn.
Suzanne Dorn?
Mrs. Roger Dorn.
So long. You're a great kid.
Hi, Jake.
I didn't know who she was. I swear to God.
Got one off the chest, but he's up with it, and it's over!
Bye-bye, honey. See you at the park. Wish me luck.
Before you go,
there's something I'd like to tell you.
What?
I don't know what Dorn's wife is up to, but I think it best
if you get dressed out early and out to the bullpen
before Dorn hits the clubhouse, okay?
Hey, we got a big problem.
Cerrano wants some extra power for tonight.
He's looking to sacrifice a live chicken.
Hey, Jake, man, we can't have people
puking in the locker room before the game.
God, what next?
All right, tell him not to worry. I'll think of something. Come on.
Jake.
Where's Vaughn? Seen him around?
If you do, tell him I'd like to have a little talk with him.
- Thanks, Pepper. - Yeah.
One whole chicken, just like you said.
Hello again, everybody.
Harry Doyle bidding you a big Wahoo welcome
from Municipal Stadium,
where tonight, before a capacity crowd of 75,000 screaming feather-heads,
the fighting braves of the Cuyahoga
will leave their teepees in search of Cleveland's
first league championship in over 30 years.
Standing in the way, their long-time nemesis,
the New York Yankees.
Trying to put the stop on the Yanks will be Eddie Harris,
the tribe's veteran right-hander.
- Monte, anything to add? - No.
He's not the best colorman in the league for nothing, folks.
All right, we're set to go.
- Are you ready? - We're ready!
Are you ready? Let's take it to 'em!
Two out in the first inning, and Harris looking very sharp, so far.
The sign from Taylor. The target goes up, and the pitch.
Here's a bouncer to third, easy play for Dorn.
Fires across to Metcalfe, and the Yankees are gone in the first.
Bottom of the third,
Cerrano swings and misses, strike three.
Springer leads away from first.
Harris comes to the plate, Taylor, snap throw to first, got him!
Springer is picked off.
Jackson deals. Hayes pops it up,
and that will do it for the Indians in the fourth.
Harris delivers. K- Y ball hit toward the hole.
Hey, great stop by Dorn! Throws in time, and he got him.
A curve ball, and down goes Cerrano again.
Strike!
Williams swings and drives one deep.
Back goes Hayes. Way back to the wall.
Jumps, and makes a great catch!
What a play, and the Yankees are turned away in the sixth!
Still nothing-nothing. Top of the seventh, with two out.
Harris has been in trouble, but has battled his way out
with the help of some great defensive plays.
All right, here's Burton coming on.
Harris, from the stretch, is ready, and here he comes to Burton.
He swings and drives one to right field.
Uh-oh, this one is way back, way back. It is off the reservation.
A home run, and the Yankees now lead two to nothing.
That ought to shut these people up.
Well, the Indians have been living dangerously all night,
and Burton finally burned them.
One down, bottom of the seventh.
Taylor hits a ground ball to short. Danello up with it.
On to first in time, and Taylor is hobbling a little
as he goes back to the dugout.
- Now batting, number 24. - Go, Roger.
Third baseman, Roger Dorn.
Dorn up. Two men out, bottom of the seventh.
The Indians running out of chances.
Dorn, off to a slow start this year,
has come on lately, hitting.271, with 86 RBIs.
Here's the wind-up, and the pitch to him.
And he swings and drives a base hit to left field.
And the Indians have a runner here with two men out
on a sharp single to left by Dorn.
All right. That'll bring up Cerrano, the big man, with two away,
and he represents the tying run.
Now batting, number 13, Pedro Cerrano.
Cerrano hitless tonight.
As a matter of fact, he hasn't touched the ball yet.
- Pedro! Pedro! Pedro! - Pedro! Pedro! Pedro!
Cerrano ready now.
Here's the pitch. Swings and misses.
We should have gotten a live chicken.
Cerrano digging in. Down a strike.
Jackson gets his sign, and comes set.
Checks Dorn at first. Here's the pitch.
A curve ball. Swung on and missed.
Strike two, and Cerrano wasn't even close to that one.
Pissed off now, Jobu.
Look, I good to you. I stick up for you.
If you no help me now,
I say, fuck you, Jobu. I do it myself.
Jackson wants a new sign. Now he's got what he likes.
Here's the pitch to Cerrano.
He swings, and drives one to deep left.
Way back! Way back! This ball is gone!
Yeah!
Jobu! Yes!
Sit down, Charlie.
Welcome to the happy hunting ground!
The Indians have tied it at two
on a two-run blast by Cerrano.
Two outs, top of the ninth, still tied at two.
Harris working on a seven-hitter.
Here's the pitch. Saslow hits a long drive.
This one's gonna get over Cerrano's head and off the wall.
Cerrano up with it. Fires it back in, Marx digging for third.
Saslow into second with a standing double,
and the Yankees have runners at second and third,
as Harris is now beginning to show signs of fatigue.
Shit!
Get Vaughn up.
Activity continues in the bullpen.
Harris is in real trouble now.
He got the first two hitters, then gave up a single and a double,
and has now gone 3 and 0 to Cheevers.
Harris sets, checks the runners.
Comes to the plate. High, ball four,
and the bases are loaded, and that's gonna bring up
Clue Haywood, the biggest Indian-killer of them all.
Taylor and Brown on their way to the mound,
and this could be all for Harris. He has pitched a beauty.
How's it holding, Eddie? You look a little tired.
I'm throwing every piece of junk I can think of at 'em, skipper.
I got enough left for one more hitter.
Nah. You pitched a hell of a game there.
Take a seat, and we'll see if we can get this guy out for you.
- All right. - Good game, Eddie.
Give me Vaughn.
You want Vaughn?
I know he hasn't done very well against this guy,
but I got a hunch he's due.
Good job. Good job.
Wild thing
You make my heart sing
I hate this fucking song.
Come on, wild thing
Wild thing, I think I love you
But I wanna know for sure
Okay, Ricky.
Haywood likes the hard stuff out over the plate,
so bust him in, and don't get up with anything.
- You listening to me, Rick? - Yeah.
Okay, you're my man. Go get him, kid.
This guy's the out you've been waiting your whole life for.
Wild thing
Come on, wild thing
Come on, come on, come on, wild thing
Shake it, shake it, shake it, shake it
Wild thing
Come on, come on, wild thing
So, a surprise move by Brown here, bringing in the Wild Thing,
who's been shelled in two outings against the Yankees.
Oh, shit.
Let's cut through the crap, Vaughn. I only got one thing to say to you.
Strike this motherfucker out!
Okay, the conference on the mound is over,
and we are ready to go.
Now batting, number six, first baseman, Clue Haywood.
Haywood steps in,
the American League's Triple Crown winner.
.341 average, 48 homers, 121 RBIs.
He's homered the only two times he's faced Vaughn.
All right, Ricky. Let's get nasty.
Haywood's set at the plate.
Vaughn, from the wind-up...
Swing and a miss.
That sucker was moving, wasn't it?
If it hit you, it'd leave a two-foot hole coming out.
Okay, what shall we call now?
Let's see what the kid feels about the old number one.
Wild Thing delivers. Strike two!
Fuck!
Forget about the curve ball, Ricky. Give him the heater.
Now, shit. All these pitches to choose from.
Maybe we ought to try something different this time.
- Got him swinging! - Strike three!
All right, Ricky! Yeah!
Oh, Lordy! Three straight heaters, and the Yankees are blown down.
No runs, two hits, three left on.
And are you ready, Cleveland?
We go to the Indian ninth still tied at two.
Can you believe this, Monte?
One down in the ninth. Jackson delivers, Tomlinson swings
and drives one deep to right field!
Back goes Worberg and makes the catch against the wall.
Tomlinson gave it a ride, but came up short.
That's gonna bring a visit to the mound.
And Horton wasting no time. He's going to the Duke.
The Duke leads the league in saves, strikeouts per inning
and hit batsmen.
This guy threw at his own kid in a father-son game.
Now batting, number double zero, center fielder Willie Mays Hayes.
Two down now, as Hayes steps in, hitting.291.
Trying to get something going for the tribe.
The Duke, who's been overpowering down the stretch,
has not been scored upon in his last 16 appearances.
The Duke ready now and delivers. Here's a high chopper towards short.
Danello charges. Can he get him? No!
- Safe! - Hayes beat it!
All right!
- Going somewhere, meat? - About 90 feet.
Number seven, catcher Jake Taylor.
Taylor to the plate.
He's 0 for 12 against the Duke, lifetime.
The Duke has his sign and is ready.
Hayes with a good lead.
- Go! Go! Go! Go! - Go! Go! Go! Go!
A quick move by the Duke, and Hayes just beat it back.
Safe!
Hayes leads away again.
Tie game, 2-2, two outs in the ninth,
and the winning run at first.
Hayes out to a big lead now.
Hayes goes!
Come on!
Come on, Willie.
Here's the throw.
- Safe! - Yeah!
Yeah!
All right, Willie! Way to go!
- Whoo! All right! - You, man! You, man!
It's up to Taylor now,
as the Indians have the winning run in scoring position.
That's a hell of an idea.
What's this? Taylor is pointing to the bleachers.
He's calling his shot.
Nobody's done this since Babe Ruth in the '32 World Series.
Hayes leads from second, as Duke takes his stretch.
The pitch.
Look out! Down goes Taylor!
Come on, hairball! Cut down on that shit, man!
Bring that shit to me, man.
Taylor back up, refusing to dust himself off
after Duke gave him a little chin music.
Taylor's pointing again!
Unbelievable. They're on their feet here, stomping, clapping.
Come on. Join in wherever you are out there.
Let's hear you, Cleveland!
- Go, go, go! - Go, go, go!
Taylor waits at the plate.
The Duke at the belt. Hayes away from second.
Here comes the 1-1 pitch.
Taylor bunts.
Shit.
Safe!
Hayes around third! He's gonna try to score!
Here comes the throw.
He slides! He is...
Safe! Safe!
And the Indians win it! The Indians win it!
Oh, my God! The Indians win it!
I can't believe it!
We did it! We did it!